From Cracked:
In Hollywood, anything can blow up. Thanks to this rule, we've all had to experience our fair share of explosions that, well, strain credibility a little. And then there are the ones that are just completely retarded.
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Lincoln's Yarns and Stories; A Complete Collection of the Funny and Witty Anecdotes That Made Lincoln Famous as America's Greatest Story Teller
How to Be Funny: The One and Only Practical Guide for Every Occasion, Situation, and Disaster (no kidding)
Phillips' Book of Great Thoughts & Funny Sayings: A Stupendous Collection of Quotes, Quips, Epigrams, Witticisms, and Humorous Comments. For Personal Enjoyment and Ready Reference.